Compare ourselves with others we are used tochildhood. Perhaps, everyone remembers how parents repeatedly tried to prick him with successes or some outstanding peer qualities, emphasizing that he is far away from them? Growing up, we ourselves, by habit, continue to compare ourselves with other people. And not always it is in our favor.
And if in childhood we just took offense at the elders andinternally resisted this comparison, then becoming adults, we suffer from our own habit of measuring our dignity by the successes of others, involuntarily dropping our self-esteem.
When such comparisons increasingly interfere with the enjoyment of life, one must begin to struggle with it. How to stop comparing yourself with others? There are different ways.
Is it worth fighting with the habit of comparing
How to stop comparing yourself with others and startlive fully? And is it possible at all, because everyone has such a habit? Completely get rid of it, perhaps, will not work, but try to do so that it does not poison our lives, it is just necessary. But how?
To begin with, you just need to consciously takethe decision to abandon comparisons. No one but the man himself can do this for him. Only with the habit of comparing oneself with more successful and successful people can a person truly experience happiness and freedom. And it's worth it to learn how to stop comparing yourself with others and get rid of this habit forever.
Do we compare with that?
How to stop comparing yourself with others?The reasons for this habit lie not only in upbringing. We are constantly imposed artificial stereotypes of beautiful life through advertising on television, on the Internet. And we often are not ready to resist this, forgetting that advertising aims to sell, and not show real life from the screens.
A sense of second-rate often occurs whencomparing themselves with more successful or more beautiful real people. For example, when viewing photos of your friends and acquaintances on social networks. Successful, at first glance, people like to exhibit selfie, made in foreign travel, in rich homes, prestigious restaurants.
And it's a shame to realize that your life is not so bright ... Compared with all this magnificence, your own happy moments seem to fade.
And did not you ever get the idea that people,exhibiting on the Internet these photos, just create the illusion of prosperity? And it is not a fact that "successful" and "brilliant" would not envy your cozy and simple happiness ...
Only by learning to appreciate what has, and to be grateful to fate for this, a person can truly experience the taste of life!
Engage in self-flagellation is stupid
If in childhood we "measure" with peerscorrect, in terms of adults, behavior or good grades, prestigious toys, then at an older age we begin to compare machines, outfits, figures, career growth, rest places, luck and success ...
When such a comparison is increasingly indisappointment gnaws at the benefit of others, he begins to doubt himself and feel defective. Indecision in one's own forces does not at all stimulate to achieve more, but on the contrary, contributes to the fact that they give up ...
Psychologists say - such self-flagellationsenseless and even stupid. After all, the universe has created each person unique. Every one of us is unique. Someone given talent in one area, someone - in another; some have received extraordinary beauty from God, and others have been given a beautiful soul; still others seem to have neither beauty nor special abilities, but in life they are so fortunate that many envy them ...
That is why you don’t need to compare yourself with other people - the same unique creatures. It is only logical to compare ... with oneself, but differently, in other circumstances or at another time.
How to compare yourself ... with yourself
Why be measured by virtues and successes withoutstanding athletes or artists? It is much more useful to compare yourself with yourself, but some time ago. For example, to recall that until recently it was not available, and today it has already become a reality. Such a comparison motivates self-improvement, to become better.
So, if the question is how to stop comparingyourself with others, relevant to you, it is useful to learn how to make such a comparison with yesterday’s, to give a real assessment of your progress and begin to be proud of today's successes. How?
Do not forget about their own merits
Usually we compare ourselves with others for some particular indicator. But after all, some people were given some advantages from birth, others were given to someone ... Each has both strengths and weaknesses.
But here's a paradox:we extol others' successes to the skies, they seem delightful and unique to us. But for some reason we very quickly forget about our own achievements. They warm the soul only at the beginning, and after a while feelings of pride and joy are replaced by a gray stripe of despondency.
Psychologists advise people with low self-esteemall achievements, even the smallest, to write. For this it is recommended to have a special diary. And as soon as there is a feeling that once again after comparing themselves with others, self-esteem again catastrophically falls, you just need to re-read your entries in the achievement diary. It is very important not to forget the list of your success constantly replenish!
But do not be vain
The flip side of the coin is a comparison of yourself with thosewho in something does not reach your level. This, too, will lead to nothing good. Only at first glance it may seem that, comparing himself with those who are less successful in some field, a person raises his self-esteem. In fact, this leads to vanity. And most importantly, it inhibits its own self-development, does not allow an arrogant person to grow. After all, why become better if you already excel someone in something?
In any case, comparing yourself with others is harmful. After all, such a comparison makes a person either unhappy or conceited. And one and the other does not bear anything positive in itself.
Control yourself
Control the moments when you start to compareyourself with others: as soon as the thought of your own superiority or inferiority comes to mind, get her out of there right away! To get rid of vanity or bitter envy is easier in their very bud.
And in parallel, it does not hurt to do the study of their complexes. Maybe you should not envy others, but try to tighten up the area of life in which you are a little behind?
For example, you are far from the perfect figurefamiliar or movie actress? Do not hurry to get upset about this - better go to the fitness club! And if you feel that your success at work is significantly inferior to the achievements of colleagues, you should do self-development or sign up for refresher courses.
If, on the contrary, you feel in some way your superiority over others - help them catch up to your level. Your self-esteem will only increase.
How to stop comparing yourself with other women
Most often suffer from comparing yourself with othersrepresentatives of the weaker sex. From external data to success in your personal life and career. Resolving the question of how to stop comparing yourself with other girls often becomes for them one of the important conditions for feeling happy.
Psychologists say they compare themselves to morebeautiful or successful are those who are deprived of love in life. Real, disinterested, which is not for something, but "just so." Such an inferiority complex is unwittingly brought up in girls by parents as a child, when they praise, kiss, or allow something pleasant for good grades, help around the house, etc.
And if this is a completely wrong ideaabout love is firmly established in the mind, it must be eradicated. To begin with, every girl must learn to love herself the way God created her. Each has its drawbacks, but there are also advantages, for which small imperfections are simply not visible! It is important to remember that only by loving herself and accepting her imperfection, a woman can find harmony.
How to stop comparing yourself with other people. Conclusion
Since childhood, we all compare ourselves with others, but we have to get rid of this bad habit.
Consciously track and stop every desire to compare.
While admiring the virtues of others, do not forget about your own strengths.
Love yourself as you are. Accept your imperfection. Remember, there are no perfect people.
Acting in this way, you will not notice that you no longer face the task of how to stop comparing yourself with others.
